I got famaliar with the boyfriend of a good friend since he started hanging out with us from time to time. He is a really good guy etc. My friend likes him for his qualities but since she says he is horrible in bed she is still sleeping with her ex.
So I just got a call from my friend's boyfriend. They have been dating for about 2 years now he wants to propose on valentines day. Because he knows she and I are so tight he want's me to help him choose the perfect ring and help him plan a proposal to remember.
I feel caught between a rock and a hard place...I don't feel its my place to discourage him but I don't see her giving up sex with her ex. Worst of all I don't want to be caught up in the middle if and when he finds out what has been going on for the last year or so.
This is a serious "why me" moment. I don't even know what to do on this one.

Ignore and Deny.

And your friend needs to learn how to keep her legs closed too.

I got famaliar with the boyfriend of a good friend since he started hanging out with us from time to time. He is a really good guy etc. My friend likes him for his qualities but since she says he is horrible in bed she is still sleeping with her ex.
So I just got a call from my friend's boyfriend. They have been dating for about 2 years now he wants to propose on valentines day. Because he knows she and I are so tight he want's me to help him choose the perfect ring and help him plan a proposal to remember.
I feel caught between a rock and a hard place...I don't feel its my place to discourage him but I don't see her giving up sex with her ex. Worst of all I don't want to be caught up in the middle if and when he finds out what has been going on for the last year or so.
This is a serious "why me" moment. I don't even know what to do on this one.

Being caught in the middle is no fun!

Why not give your friend the heads up? Tell he what he is planning, also advise her the she has to either give up the sex with her ex or be honest with her current boyfriend and letting him know that she is not satisfied in bed and suggesting what he can do to improve..

Or just break up....letting him down gently!

On the other hand, I would find some excuse about Valentine not being the best time to get engaged and suggesting a date 6 months away that gives her time to deal with her "situation"!

Being caught in the middle is no fun!
Why not give your friend the heads up? Tell he what he is planning, also advise her the she has to either give up the sex with her ex or be honest with her current boyfriend and letting him know that she is not satisfied in bed and suggesting what he can do to improve..
Or just break up....letting him down gently!
On the other hand, I would find some excuse about Valentine not being the best time to get engaged and suggesting a date 6 months away that gives her time to deal with her "situation"!Brown Suga, you seem very crafty.. seems like you have experience in dumping men, gently... wow... You have before this info.. impressed me as one of the best.. or the great ones left.... but....

cheers :)!!!!

crafty women.

tell your GF what he has planned so it won't hit her in the head and she will be prepared. No doubt if she says Yes to his proposal, she will continue the fling on the side.

Your friend is playing a dangerous game. You should have distanced yourself from her the minute you found out that she was still screwing her ex and refuses to stop, especially since you admit her boyfriend is a genuinely good guy. Your conscious should have forced you to distance yourself, and not be an accessory to this game of deceit your friend is playing. I don't care how close you guys are, I would not be friends with a person like that.

Your friend is a Coward with a capital 'C'. She should have been honest with the man from day one. If the sex sucks, if you don't want to hang around to help him improve, then leave him alone altogether.

Brown Suga, you seem very crafty.. seems like you have experience in dumping men, gently... wow... You have before this info.. impressed me as one of the best.. or the great ones left.... but....

Tanx for the compliment I am flattered and yes I am one of the best/great ones left. Just looking for Mr. Right! And no I have never had to dump anyone gently or otherwise, but I do know that sex is vital to a relationship even though it is not the be all and the end all.

Stay out of the people business - no matter what you do you will be wrong!

tell your GF what he has planned so it won't hit her in the head and she will be prepared. No doubt if she says Yes to his proposal, she will continue the fling on the side.

She really shouldn't say yes, if he proposes!

Tanx for the compliment I am flattered and yes I am one of the best/great ones left. Just looking for Mr. Right! And no I have never had to dump anyone gently or otherwise, but I do know that sex is vital to a relationship even though it is not the be all and the end all.Great, so now I will revert to my previous impression before post no. 3... but seriously.. your friend is tatally dishonest... she should come stright.. some one can get hurt... Recall .. it is a thin line between love and hate.. and in both emotions go deep.. reall deep...

But I am sure you will act wisely...

Great, so now I will revert to my previous impression before post no. 3... but seriously.. your friend is tatally dishonest... she should come stright.. some one can get hurt... Recall .. it is a thin line between love and hate.. and in both emotions go deep.. reall deep...
But I am sure you will act wisely...

Dont get mixed up now!!!!

I am not the originator of this thread!

Dont get mixed up now!!!!
I am not the originator of this thread!WELL, I was referring to your generous advise to left down gently.. thus not been fully honest... BUT I was not mixed up.. just forgot... my apologies... LOL.....

Stay out of the people business - no matter what you do you will be wrong!

In a nutshell Clancy.

Since you are in the middle right now, you may want to approach your friend, "hypothetically" about his proposing and she how she carries on. You don't want to come between them, but knowing what you know, you can't let a good one go down the wrong path, cause it don't sound like if your friend is serious at all.

If you're this guy's friend, please try to warn him if she doesn't get the message. She's sleeping with her ex and God knows who he's (the ex) is still sleeping with. He must be told.