This is an unfair assumption.
1. I don't go 'hopping up' on anything in a skirt. I'm quite particular about what I like and who I enter a relationship with. I'm 33 and don't date anyone under 27-28, so I'm not fishing in shallow water here.
2. The 'were you abused as a child' question isn't appropriate unless there is some evidence of it and/or a comfort level established between the people.
3. Those that have divulged that information always got support and love from me. I never judged them for perhaps wearing too little. I never judged them for not saying anything. I've offered to go to counseling, peer groups, etc. Keep in mind that the crimes were committed decades before...
3. The price I paid was walking down the path to marriage, kids and a fruitful life together only to have it ripped away at the last second because a repressed memory pulled her life apart. Her desire to try to ignore the issue just made it come back to her even more. Keep in mind that the abused have a jaded perception and/or a fear of 'love'.
If you think that I deserve heartbreak because some father/uncle/brother/cousin is a pervert, then that only tells me what type of person you are. I wouldn't wish my experience on anyone. Moreso, we must stop the young from having to experience this themselves.

:screw:





O..........................K

I totally agree..............but the thing is Taf,too many adolescent girls dress showin their stuff,lookin like they much older! To me that is what gasoline is to matches,it is a catalyst that exacerbates an existing problem.:shhh:


Just because she was dressed like a woman...
Does not mean that you had to sleep with her?

In fact, if we would ALL ..ask questions first, we would be better off.
Jon-Benet Ramsey, dressed like a woman too.

Een no gasoline to no fire....DO NOT SLEEP WITH EVERYTHING YOU MEET!
At least, ASK whether or not she is over age...and in fact, mature men do NOT have to ask this question.
If a man who is over 25-30....sleeps with a young woman, for God's sake, he should have the sense to know if she is a youngster or a woman near his age, by the topics she brings up and by what her objectives are.
If you can not pick up on that....you deserve to be in trouble for having sex with a minor.

Does that make it pedopaelia...no...
Does it make it nasty and against the law...yes...

But, our Minister is not the brightest of the bunch anyways..plus, I think she said this on the heels of the Fraser case. I say again, she is taking the wrong approach to this issue.

Fraser needs to go down...
If we don't put him down, God will.

Just because she was dressed like a woman...
Does not mean that you had to sleep with her?
In fact, if we would ALL ..ask questions first, we would be better off.
Jon-Benet Ramsey, dressed like a woman too.
Een no gasoline to no fire....DO NOT SLEEP WITH EVERYTHING YOU MEET!
At least, ASK whether or not she is over age...and in fact, mature men do NOT have to ask this question.
If a man who is over 25-30....sleeps with a young woman, for God's sake, he should have the sense to know if she is a youngster or a woman near his age, by the topics she brings up and by what her objectives are.
If you can not pick up on that....you deserve to be in trouble for having sex with a minor.
Does that make it pedopaelia...no...
Does it make it nasty and against the law...yes...
But, our Minister is not the brightest of the bunch anyways..plus, I think she said this on the heels of the Fraser case. I say again, she is taking the wrong approach to this issue.
Fraser needs to go down...
If we don't put him down, God will.
Apparently u een have any children.First of all the point I am arguing has nothing to do with pedophilia,it has to do with enticement.Secondly and most important no father wishes to see his daughter dressed in such a manner because every Daddy knows it presents his teenage daughter as a sex object and being a man,he knows where that leads.I do not disagree with your arguement about child molestation at all,but it is very difficult to look at a fully developed,scantily dressed and all made-up 15 year old girl and tell the difference between her and an 18 or 20 year old.Period.

Apparently u een have any children.
Apparently I do not live in Communist China...or in the Medeival Europe.
:shhh:

First of all the point I am arguing has nothing to do with pedophilia,it has to do with enticement.
I understand, and it is dumb if you ask me.
At this stage, a man is not FORCED to have sex with a woman...
Men are the aggressors, it is timew we take our men to task for the stupid choices they make when they think with their penis's.
Enticement my aunt Fanny....
A man who is over 25, should not be even LOOKING at a woman who appears to be under 21. They should have very little in common, sometimes some men do, but I would point out the emotional intelligence and social intelligence of some of them, and most of the time they are pretty dense.
But, sleeping with a minor is dumb and you should pay the price for not asking questions first.
In my notion, no chick under 18 could entice me to do ANYTHING!
First of all, if she is under 25, we have nothing to discuss, and if she is under 21 I look at her as my little sister.

Secondly and most important no father wishes to see his daughter dressed in such a manner because every Daddy knows it presents his teenage daughter as a sex object and being a man,he knows where that leads.
A woman or a person, once he or she has the sense to buy and pick out her own clothes, should wear what they want.
13-18 year old human beings, deserve the right to be treated with some respect for their descisions. That does NOT equate to them being sexually active and does NOT make it "ok" for a man to sleep with them.
The rationale is absurd.
This is NOT Iran...this is NOT Communist China...this is NOT Russia....this is NOT Medeival Europe...this is the frickin Bahamas.
:bahamas:

I do not disagree with your arguement about child molestation at all,but it is very difficult to look at a fully developed,scantily dressed and all made-up 15 year old girl and tell the difference between her and an 18 or 20 year old.Period.

Fact is, ASK QUESTIONS FIRST.
That is all I am saying.
You should NOT sleep with someone, who you barely know!
Adults, make that judgement, when they can reasonably tell, when they are dealing with adults.
Case in point, someone who has made it to a certain place in life.
With all the STD's floating around, I do not know why in the world, would anyone not ask someone questions in their sex life and natural habits.

I am a man...how come I can tell the difference, or draw the line at who should be fair game, from who should NOT be fair game?
Why is it, that every man who sleeps with a minor, pulls the same lame a.ss story, about he was tricked!?!?!
BS.
Take these nasty scum bags to task...make them own up for being an idiot's first off.
Second, make them own up for sleeping with someone you barely know.
Third, make them pay the price for both issues.

A man has a brain...as quiet as we keep it...:shhh:
He can decide, to sleep with a woman or to NOT sleep with a woman...
He also, should be trained, into having the common sense to look into who he is about to sleep with.

I see why AIDS so rampant in these parts...some of these wierd out-looks on sexuality frighten me.
:eek:

The overall point is, that whether they look like it, they mistake it, or they go intentionaly after young people, it is pedophalia and it is illegal.
We punish sickness.
I am sorry, if you do not take the time to check the "details", you deserve to pay the price. Whether you knew it or not.
Fact is, we should nto even be arguing the nature of it; which is what I think the Minister want's us to do. Blame the victim, for a short-sight on the mature adults part. If you sleep with someone under age, you deserve to pay the price; saying that they made you do it, does not cut it. the next time, you would pick your mate more carefully.
Secondly, what in the hell is a 45 year old man "per-say" doing hooning after women half his age!?!
That in it self is sick to me...and raises a red-flaf to that man's decency.
Say "yes there should be"...
There will be retribution for anyone who sleeps with a minor.
Quit this plausible deniability defence. Guys like that, do not deserve to get a free pass; whether or not the teenage girl looks mature or not!
Varrying degrees.
The overall thing for me is; you sleep with someone under age..whether you knew it or not...you pay the price.
Bottom line!
Whether you want to fashionable and call it NOT pedophaelia....is up to you, but you deserve to be put away, if you do not have the common sense to see whether or not to check your mate...or....pay the price for not checking your mate.


When did I say give them a free pass. We have discussed in other threads what the punishments should be for persons who find themselves in these situations.

The point that I am trying to make is that there is a difference and you cant lump them all under one umbrella.

All should be punished yes but should the nineteen year old boy be castrated because he was under the impression that the fifteen year old was eighteen?

I was not speaking in terms of the 'ooollllldddd man and the young teen I was speaking generally.

All are wrong, all deserve punishment, but they dont come under the same umbrella. The nineteen year old, when done paying for his crime will probablly ask for a birth certificate every time he dates someone in the future to ensure they are an adult. The pedophile on the other hand will continue to target the children unless he is treated (and the jury is still out on if them cures and treatments work in the first place)

We are on the same page here. I just wanted to highlight that there is a subtle difference.

When did I say give them a free pass. We have discussed in other threads what the punishments should be for persons who find themselves in these situations.
The point that I am trying to make is that there is a difference and you cant lump them all under one umbrella.
All should be punished yes but should the nineteen year old boy be castrated because he was under the impression that the fifteen year old was eighteen?
I was not speaking in terms of the 'ooollllldddd man and the young teen I was speaking generally.
All are wrong, all deserve punishment, but they dont come under the same umbrella. The nineteen year old, when done paying for his crime will probablly ask for a birth certificate every time he dates someone in the future to ensure they are an adult. The pedophile on the other hand will continue to target the children unless he is treated (and the jury is still out on if them cures and treatments work in the first place)
We are on the same page here. I just wanted to highlight that there is a subtle difference.


Of course I am not trying to lump it under one umbrella.
But, what this issue is trying to do, is place a wedge between what is right and what is proper to the people.
Fact is, bury the scum on all sides.
:tup:
Fact is, when we get into tangential arguments about which is more right or wrong, we tend to pick an argument that is more horrible and forget that the other one is just as bad for different reasons.

We need to send a strong clear message, on all sides.
:tup:

I dont think the Minister meant any insensitivity or harm with her words. She didnt assimilate the issue of peodophilia and young girls dressing loose probably. Fact is these are not mutually exclusive issues, and I think the latter warrants some attention and discussion.

I dont think the Minister meant any insensitivity or harm with her words. She didnt assimilate the issue of peodophilia and young girls dressing loose probably. Fact is these are not mutually exclusive issues, and I think the latter warrants some attention and discussion.

I'm sure she wasnt being insenstive..but she was being misinformed. How can you deal with or help to craft solutions/responses to a problem or set of problems if you dont understand it?

A doctor cant treat you for AIDS if he's confusing it with Cancer. While all those who have sex with children/minors should be punished, clinically, pedophiles need to be handled differently than a dude in mid-life crisis who thinks its just great that a young girl finds him attractive.

From the Nassau Guardian today...

"The number of sexual abuse cases against children in The Bahamas has escalated and now exceeds those against adults, it was reported last night.

Speaking at a prayer vigil against sexual crimes perpetrated on children, Director of the Women's Crisis Center, Dr Sandra Dean-Patterson said that of the 1500 rapes reported between 2000 and 2004, over 952 were perpetrated against children. She noted that in 2002, a six-year-old boy was assaulted by a 29-year-old man and she also made mention of the recent rape of a six-year-old girl last month. Thirty-two-year-old Andrew Bridgewater has since been charged in a Magistrate's Court with raping the school girl, who was found in an abandoned car bloodied and severely traumatised in an area near to BEC's Blue Hill and Soldier Road Power station. This recent case has sparked much public outrage, which has led the Crisis Center to hold a vigil at Rawson Square in support for the six-year-old girl and other victims of abuse."

Ok. I guess its safe to say that Melanie doesnt understand what pedophilia is, and that a child cannot cause or encourage someone to be a pedophile...
Dress prompts paedophilia
By RAYMOND KONGWA, Guardian Senior Reporter
raymond@nasguard.com
While addressing some of the issues surrounding paedophilia in the country, Minister of Social Services and Community Devel-opment Melanie Griffin said she believed some teenage girls were becoming targets for older men because of the way they were dressing. "What seems to be the problem to my mind is that there is no regard for the age of children," said Mrs. Griffin. "For example, we are having problems a lot in the teenage areas. And we are talking about children between the ages of, let's say, ten and thirteen.
"There is a whole lot happening. I think our girls are a lot more mature. And perhaps they dress more maturely," she said. "Adults ought to realize that it doesn't matter how they're dressed, these are children. And so certainly we have to always be of that mindset."
Added Mrs Griffin: "That's why you find a lot of men anywhere from eighteen and up getting into a lot of trouble, because they're not allowing themselves to see these children as children. But they are looking at, perhaps, how developed they are."
In addition, Minister Griffin revealed that mandatory reporting of child abuse will be included in the Child Protection Bill, which the government plans to take to Parliament this week.

Better check the hormones in the food we eat. What do you think they feed chickens what do you think happens to our kids that eat that chicken???

What is distubing y2kbad is that men who sleep with children are given high fives and embraced by some people instead of being universally shunned and condemned..that Frazier guy should not even be allowed on a Jitney, I don't know about not being allowed on a jitney but something close. but I was surprised to see the Bishop being hugged by members of the public on Natiional tv, so go figure. Therefore it would be progressive doing away with the arbitrary age-of-consent thing because we would no longer have to be hypocrites about the issue. If she bleeds, she has needs (sorry ladies of BI ):D

It is a fact that girls also explore their sexuality so why the apology?

it is as plain as the nose on my face that all the woman is tryin to say is that these little chirren need to stop dressin provacatively.

we all know that if a woman or child runs around naked that does not give someone the right to rape them.

however the way u dress says something about u. if a female dresses provocatively she is saying look at me i am easy and slack. the same can be said if a guy walks around in low ridin baggy pants with a do rag on, a screwed up face etc he is saying dont mess wit me cuase i am hard and i will mess u up if u even look at me wrong. the same can be said for someone dressed in a business suit it says i am a professional and i mean business.

i nver noticed this until my sis pointed it out to me but when u go in wal mart children section, these little girl style got all their back out and legs showin. the other day my little cousin came to me in this short skirt, she only have to shift little bit to see her under wear. she is only 5.

yet again i am not sayin it gives people the green light to fool with these kids but for goodness sakes these parents need to stop dressin these little girls in these sexy get ups.

also i forgot to mention i was watching a documentary on pedofiles and they had a guy on there who was in prision for chiild molestation. i will never forget the outrageousnes of one of his statements. he said: "when a little girl is doing cart wheels in a short skirt, she is being sexually seductive." he also said something like, " little children naturaly want to have sex with adults but adults brain wash kids from an early age that it is wrong."

Exactly! Too many young girls dress provocatively! That is what girls do that is what they are ment to do. I attract a mate. No matter what you say attracrion starts vuisualy I mean man.....some even be 14 or 15 looking like they are 18 or 20! Their Daddies or Mummies need to stop them from doing that,no good is going to come to them dressed that way.Our culture is designed for men to be attracted to girls dressed that way,mistakes can be easily made by otherwise decent men. A mistake is one thing but one has to ask who in making the mistake? Or the man/woman who will have sex with a stranger The pervs are another matter.

I dont think the Minister meant any insensitivity or harm with her words. She didnt assimilate the issue of peodophilia and young girls dressing loose probably. Fact is these are not mutually exclusive issues, and I think the latter warrants some attention and discussion.


Finally we have some thread decency on this issue.
We do not like to deal with these types os issues, because we hate doing any real leg work.
Distinguishing real perverts from the guys who have pervert tendencies may be too much for our girls over at Social Services.

Fact is, we can study and make a clear distinction; but, we need to send a clear message to anyone who sleeps with a minor.
Regardless of the nature of the case. The sickness and damage done, in this case, far outweighs the nuanced nature of the specifics.
Trying to figure out whether or not a man was tricked, as opposed to whether or not a guy went after knowingly a minor, can get sketchy, if we allow it to cloud our moral compass.

Truth is, we should not care. You sleep with a minor, you get sentenced for it as hard as we can give it
It seems really simple to me.

We have to protect the children. The children and the youth come first.
:tup:

Finally we have some thread decency on this issue.
We do not like to deal with these types os issues, because we hate doing any real leg work.
Distinguishing real perverts from the guys who have pervert tendencies may be too much for our girls over at Social Services.


Well, teach them, train them how to distinguish. I am sure they are willing to learn. Like NB said it is a vital key and our "experts" should be equipped with this discernment. Don't you think?