I had yet another unpleasent experience with a Jehova's Witness this morning. The worst part was, I was too tired to play any games with them.

Everyone here should be sure to print out this post, and hang it in the wall beside your door. Be prepared.

How To Get Rid of Jehovah's Witnesses

1. Answer the door naked and carrying weaponry (immediate results).

2. Pretend to be the slowest talking person in the world and see how long their spirit of charity lasts.

3. Answer every one of their questions with: "What do you mean by that?" This might take a while, but you and your loved ones can have fun placing bets on how long it takes for them to get flustered and leave.

4. Ask them to reconcile Revelation 1 and 22 for the "Alpha & Omega's" identity (Jesus or God), repeat constantly. You may have to resort to another method to actually get rid of them, but this will definitely make them sweat.

5. Excuse yourself from your living room (or wherever)... and don't come back.

6. Make a series of increasingly reprehensible fake phone calls (bookie, drug deal, obscene call, and if they are STILL there, a tearful confession to the police for the murder of the last Witnesses who visited you.)

7. Pick an oft-repeated word in their lexicon (God, Jesus, heaven, it, the, etc.) and giggle whenever they utter it. If they ask you what's going on, say "Nothing, why?" in very even tones, and giggle again.

8. Same as #7, except say "beep" instead of giggling.

9. (Males only) Feign an intense interest in their spiel. Part way through, begin putting on make-up, hosiery, a dress, the whole nine yards. Make encouraging noises (uh-huh, I see...) throughout, and if they ask you what you're doing, pull a # 7. If they're still there when you are done, Ask them if they would please kindly leave as you have a hot date in ten minutes.

10. Look smug and tell them that your God can beat up their God.

I tell them I am a Buddhist and I offer to take their books if they will take mine, they often do.

They now walk around my house as if it were radioactive. Kind of a shame because they are good folks at heart, just doing what their religion demands.

anyone/thing that comes on my property without permission or prior knowledge gets the same response, a nice big rock in the air, maybe some mace, or bug spray, or whatever is lying arounf at the time!!

:-))

No, but basically we dont have them come around here, also, I just dont asnwer my door if I dont want to talk to anyone, or id tell them to carry their arses!~ I have alarm beams and cameras everywhere so they would set off my alarm which would scare even the strongest of them, I have 4 sirens, and then some.

anyone/thing that comes on my property without permission or prior knowledge gets the same response, a nice big rock in the air, maybe some mace, or bug spray, or whatever is lying arounf at the time!

Remind me to wear a crash helmet and a gas mask if I ever visit you! :shaky:

This is a post based on ignorance. I study with Jehovahs Witnesses and asked a similar question because i too listened to thoughts like this ones post.

Here is the answer i was given, and it was clear, concise and simple from the Bible. This was an article that is often in the booklets, where they answer peoples questions about things just like this. People who are not witnesses mostly. And i too asked this question.

*** w53 1/1 p. 31 Questions from Readers ***

• Revelation 22:13 (NW) speaks of the “Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last, the beginning and the end”. At Revelation 1:17 (NW) Christ Jesus is spoken of as “the First and the Last”. So is not Revelation 22:13 also referring to Christ? The context sounds like it, yet the Watchtower publications say Jehovah is the “Alpha and the Omega”. Why?—J. J., New Jersey.

Alpha is the first letter of the Greek alphabet, and omega is the last; one is the beginning and the other the end of the Greek alphabet. So the expressions “the Alpha and the Omega” and “the first and the last” and “the beginning and the end” are parallel expressions and mean the same thing. They are applied to Jehovah God. Isaiah 44:6 (AS) reads: “Thus saith Jehovah, the King of Israel, and his Redeemer, Jehovah of hosts: I am the first, and I am the last; and besides me there is no God.” Revelation 1:8 (NW) catches up this thought in Isaiah and adds to it the point that he is coming: “‘I am the Alpha and the Omega,’ says Jehovah God, ‘the One who is and who was and who is coming, the Almighty.’”

So just because the verse preceding Revelation 22:13 speaks of that “Alpha and Omega” as coming does not necessarily mean it refers to Christ Jesus, whose second coming is frequently mentioned. Revelation 1:8 shows Jehovah as coming, and so Revelation 22:12 may do likewise. He comes representatively, through Christ Jesus. Revelation 4:8 speaks of Jehovah as coming, and Revelation 21 shows his presence with humankind. “Look! the tent of God is with humankind, and he will reside with them, and they will be his peoples. And God himself will be with them. .*.*. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To anyone thirsting I will give from the fountain of the water of life free. Anyone conquering will inherit these things, and I shall be his God and he will be my son.” (Vss. 3, 6, 7) This reference is certainly to Jehovah God, for he is God to the anointed body members of Christ and they are his spiritual sons. They are Christ’s brothers, not sons, so the text is speaking of Jehovah, and it calls him “the Alpha and the Omega”. So when the Alpha and Omega is mentioned again in the very next chapter, why must the term suddenly shift to Christ Jesus instead of Jehovah God? It does not.

Some argue that it refers to Christ Jesus at Revelation 22:13 because verse 16 shows Jesus speaking. But that does not mean the speaker of the preceding verses must also be Jesus. The use of the single quotation marks in the New World Translation shows a change in speakers between verses 15 and 16. We must remember that the revelation God gave to Jesus Christ was passed on to the apostle John by one of Christ’s angels, and that this angel sometimes spoke for Jehovah God and sometimes for Christ Jesus; so we must watch for these changes and note them on the basis of content and context. It is true that when the angel speaks for Christ, at Revelation 1:17 (NW), he states: “I am the First and the Last.” But a check of the context shows this “First and Last” was with definite limitations, was relative to just the matter of Christ Jesus’ death and resurrection, as verse 18 shows. Christ was the first one raised in the first resurrection, and the last one that will be raised directly by Jehovah God. Others who follow in that resurrection will be raised by God through Christ. (John 6:40; 1*Cor. 6:14) In fact, this limitation is also shown by the footnote on “First” in Revelation 1:17 in the New World Translation, where “First” is shown to mean “Firstborn” by one ancient manuscript. Christ was the firstfruits of those asleep in death. (1*Cor. 15:20) When “First and Last” is again applied to Christ Jesus, at Revelation 2:8, note that again it is with respect to death and resurrection. But when it speaks thus of Jehovah no limitation is set on the meaning.

So we must be reasonable. When we see an expression that is applied to Jehovah several times in its unlimited sense, and then come across it again but not specifically indicated as applying to Jehovah, we cannot become flighty and switch the expression to Christ Jesus; and especially when we note that it is applied elsewhere, not in its unlimited sense, but only with definite limitation of meaning. Trinitarians try to capitalize on this expression to show it was used indiscriminately for either God or Christ, and in this way show God and Christ are the same. But logic and reason do not allow this, no more than do many other texts in the Bible.

the last jehovah's witness that came to my house! when they deared speak against homosexuals (who mind their business)...I politely let them know my stance about the social ills of the african diaspora and economics literacy et al...it was a one woman show...you had to be there to see the savage "bible beating" I gave them...they got it because they woke me up out of my sleep and I was angry..I was nursing a hangover plus I was hungry...I lashed out at them for 2 hours was it...and the dénouement of it all was they tried to give me a watchtower with the white jesus on it after I spoke about my Jesus being seen in our own light! I screamed! one thing is certain they will never forget me and I know they are better people because they met me!

I had yet another unpleasent experience with a Jehova's Witness this morning. The worst part was, I was too tired to play any games with them.
Everyone here should be sure to print out this post, and hang it in the wall beside your door. Be prepared.
How To Get Rid of Jehovah's Witnesses
1. Answer the door naked and carrying weaponry (immediate results).
2. Pretend to be the slowest talking person in the world and see how long their spirit of charity lasts.
3. Answer every one of their questions with: "What do you mean by that?" This might take a while, but you and your loved ones can have fun placing bets on how long it takes for them to get flustered and leave.
4. Ask them to reconcile Revelation 1 and 22 for the "Alpha & Omega's" identity (Jesus or God), repeat constantly. You may have to resort to another method to actually get rid of them, but this will definitely make them sweat.
5. Excuse yourself from your living room (or wherever)... and don't come back.
6. Make a series of increasingly reprehensible fake phone calls (bookie, drug deal, obscene call, and if they are STILL there, a tearful confession to the police for the murder of the last Witnesses who visited you.)
7. Pick an oft-repeated word in their lexicon (God, Jesus, heaven, it, the, etc.) and giggle whenever they utter it. If they ask you what's going on, say "Nothing, why?" in very even tones, and giggle again.
8. Same as #7, except say "beep" instead of giggling.
9. (Males only) Feign an intense interest in their spiel. Part way through, begin putting on make-up, hosiery, a dress, the whole nine yards. Make encouraging noises (uh-huh, I see...) throughout, and if they ask you what you're doing, pull a # 7. If they're still there when you are done, Ask them if they would please kindly leave as you have a hot date in ten minutes.
10. Look smug and tell them that your God can beat up their God.

I like 9

old post alert ...

some came around the other day while i was cleaning and was half out my door .. they wanted to give me a booklet after they asked me who rules the world and i said "ME" ... and then i said no point as the booklet will just end up on that pile of garbage (which i was sweeping up) and save it for someone else .. they didnt stay long .. .. :angel:

I had yet another unpleasent experience with a Jehova's Witness this morning. The worst part was, I was too tired to play any games with them.
Everyone here should be sure to print out this post, and hang it in the wall beside your door. Be prepared.
How To Get Rid of Jehovah's Witnesses
1. Answer the door naked and carrying weaponry (immediate results).
2. Pretend to be the slowest talking person in the world and see how long their spirit of charity lasts.
3. Answer every one of their questions with: "What do you mean by that?" This might take a while, but you and your loved ones can have fun placing bets on how long it takes for them to get flustered and leave.
4. Ask them to reconcile Revelation 1 and 22 for the "Alpha & Omega's" identity (Jesus or God), repeat constantly. You may have to resort to another method to actually get rid of them, but this will definitely make them sweat.
5. Excuse yourself from your living room (or wherever)... and don't come back.
6. Make a series of increasingly reprehensible fake phone calls (bookie, drug deal, obscene call, and if they are STILL there, a tearful confession to the police for the murder of the last Witnesses who visited you.)
7. Pick an oft-repeated word in their lexicon (God, Jesus, heaven, it, the, etc.) and giggle whenever they utter it. If they ask you what's going on, say "Nothing, why?" in very even tones, and giggle again.
8. Same as #7, except say "beep" instead of giggling.
9. (Males only) Feign an intense interest in their spiel. Part way through, begin putting on make-up, hosiery, a dress, the whole nine yards. Make encouraging noises (uh-huh, I see...) throughout, and if they ask you what you're doing, pull a # 7. If they're still there when you are done, Ask them if they would please kindly leave as you have a hot date in ten minutes.
10. Look smug and tell them that your God can beat up their God.

Do these apply when Mormons stop ppl on the street?

old post alert ...
some came around the other day while i was cleaning and was half out my door .. they wanted to give me a booklet after they asked me who rules the world and i said "ME" ... and then i said no point as the booklet will just end up on that pile of garbage (which i was sweeping up) and save it for someone else .. they didnt stay long .. .. :angel:

Strike Rory off the missions list! Lol :)

A group came round to my house a few Sundays ago. We had a nice chat for half an hour or so. No one got converted but we wished each other well.:angel:

Do these apply when Mormons stop ppl on the street?

now those are some persistent people! their usually young people on their pilgrimage or whatever its called...but they mean well...I even entertained a phone call from one of them for a minute...I had the book of mormon but where that is I couldnt tell you now...

Strike Rory off the missions list! Lol :)
A group came round to my house a few Sundays ago. We had a nice chat for half an hour or so. No one got converted but we wished each other well.:angel:

tell us the story...you probably scared um like me;)

Do these apply when Mormons stop ppl on the street?


on the street, juz ignore them .. look the other way, or s tart talking to yourself if you cant get rid of them ..

tell us the story...you probably scared um like me;)

Well, I don’t really want to drive them away. They want to share with me. I see that as a compliment. However, most missionaries have a set program that they follow and regurgitate to their prospective targets. They assume one is going to listen, without questions and that the target knows little or nothing about Christianity - often they are right. They are prepared to talk with Christians, even atheists, but they have little or no training or understanding of any other faith. I fact they are surprised to encounter such persons. They dont know what to do! It shuts them up, mostly!

Well, I don’t really want to drive them away. They want to share with me. I see that as a compliment. However, most missionaries have a set program that they follow and regurgitate to their prospective targets. They assume one is going to listen, without questions and that the target knows little or nothing about Christianity - often they are right. They are prepared to talk with Christians, even atheists, but they have little or no training or understanding of any other faith. I fact they are surprised to encounter such persons. They dont know what to do! It shuts them up, mostly!

I am happy to have my neighbor lady,whose husband is one of the local Kingdon Hall leaders and her two sons preach as well,stop by my office about once a month.She is very nice,we have coffee,we talk and discuss family and religon,but she knows I can't be converted.I'm OK with it.:)