garnelleo
07-16-07, - 12:24 PM
Lawsuits
THE PLANTIFF: Surfer #1
THE DEFENDANT: Surfer #2
WHAT HAPPENED: Two surfers went to court after one allegedly stole the other surfer's wave.
THE VERDICT: The case was dismissed after court officials found it impossible to put a monetary value on the wave.
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THE PLANTIFF: A California grandmother
THE DEFENDANT: Disney World
WHAT HAPPENED: The grandmother took them to court after she and her grandchildren witnessed Mickey Mouse taking off his costume backstage, causing a "traumatic experience" for her grandchildren.
THE VERDICT: Unknown
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THE PLANTIFF: Construction worker in Tulsa
THE DEFENDANT: Doctors
WHAT HAPPENED: He intentionally cut his hand off with a circular saw. When he was taken to the emergency room, he told doctors not to reattach the hand, saying that it was possessed. The man is now suing the doctors for not reattaching his hand, claiming that the doctors should have known he was psychotic.
THE VERDICT: Unknown
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THE PLANTIFF: Donald Drusky
THE DEFENDANT: "God the sovereign ruler of the Universe"
WHAT HAPPENED: In 1999 the 63-year-old Drusky filed suit against God for "taking no corrective action" against an ex-employer who fired him 30 years earlier. He demanded that "God must grant him guitar playing skills and resurrect either his pet pigeon or his mother."
THE VERDICT: Dursky claimed that since God didn't show up for court, he won by default. The judge declared the suit "firvolous."
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If I just drink enough beer, women will love me, right?
1991, Richard Overton sued Anheuser-Busch for $10,000. He claimed to have suffered emotional distress, mental injury, and financial loss because drinking beer did not make his fantasies of beautiful women in tropical settings come to life, as he claimed it had advertised, driving him to buy and drink more Bud Light. The case was dismissed.
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If you can’t sue the system, sue yourself.
1995, Robert Lee Brock sued himself for $5 million. He claimed that he had violated his own civil rights and religious beliefs by allowing himself to get drunk and commit crimes which landed him in the Indian Creek Correctional Center in Virginia, serving a 23 year sentence for grand larceny and breaking and entering. What could he possibly have to gain by suing himself? Since being in prison prevented him from having an income, he expected the state to pay. This case was thrown out.
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Mistaken for a superstar? How insulting! 2006
Allen Heckard sued Michael Jordan and Nike founder Phil Knight for $832 million. He claimed to suffer defamation, permanent injury, and emotional pain and suffering because people often mistook him for the basketball star. Heckard dropped the lawsuit later that year.
THE PLANTIFF: Surfer #1
THE DEFENDANT: Surfer #2
WHAT HAPPENED: Two surfers went to court after one allegedly stole the other surfer's wave.
THE VERDICT: The case was dismissed after court officials found it impossible to put a monetary value on the wave.
-------------
THE PLANTIFF: A California grandmother
THE DEFENDANT: Disney World
WHAT HAPPENED: The grandmother took them to court after she and her grandchildren witnessed Mickey Mouse taking off his costume backstage, causing a "traumatic experience" for her grandchildren.
THE VERDICT: Unknown
-------------
THE PLANTIFF: Construction worker in Tulsa
THE DEFENDANT: Doctors
WHAT HAPPENED: He intentionally cut his hand off with a circular saw. When he was taken to the emergency room, he told doctors not to reattach the hand, saying that it was possessed. The man is now suing the doctors for not reattaching his hand, claiming that the doctors should have known he was psychotic.
THE VERDICT: Unknown
------------
THE PLANTIFF: Donald Drusky
THE DEFENDANT: "God the sovereign ruler of the Universe"
WHAT HAPPENED: In 1999 the 63-year-old Drusky filed suit against God for "taking no corrective action" against an ex-employer who fired him 30 years earlier. He demanded that "God must grant him guitar playing skills and resurrect either his pet pigeon or his mother."
THE VERDICT: Dursky claimed that since God didn't show up for court, he won by default. The judge declared the suit "firvolous."
-------
If I just drink enough beer, women will love me, right?
1991, Richard Overton sued Anheuser-Busch for $10,000. He claimed to have suffered emotional distress, mental injury, and financial loss because drinking beer did not make his fantasies of beautiful women in tropical settings come to life, as he claimed it had advertised, driving him to buy and drink more Bud Light. The case was dismissed.
------
If you can’t sue the system, sue yourself.
1995, Robert Lee Brock sued himself for $5 million. He claimed that he had violated his own civil rights and religious beliefs by allowing himself to get drunk and commit crimes which landed him in the Indian Creek Correctional Center in Virginia, serving a 23 year sentence for grand larceny and breaking and entering. What could he possibly have to gain by suing himself? Since being in prison prevented him from having an income, he expected the state to pay. This case was thrown out.
----
Mistaken for a superstar? How insulting! 2006
Allen Heckard sued Michael Jordan and Nike founder Phil Knight for $832 million. He claimed to suffer defamation, permanent injury, and emotional pain and suffering because people often mistook him for the basketball star. Heckard dropped the lawsuit later that year.