O.K., today is our 17th Wedding Anniversary! Which has got me to thinking with all of the divorces that go on and all of the folks that choose not to get married, What do BI members think makes for a happy and long marriage?

Care to share your ideas?

O.K., today is our 17th Wedding Anniversary! Which has got me to thinking with all of the divorces that go on and all of the folks that choose not to get married, What do BI members think makes for a happy and long marriage?
Care to share your ides?


The only "ides" that I have, is the Ides of March.

As for longevity in marriage, I think women have to see through the jerk in every man, and love him like they did during the full adrenalin rush of infatuation.

And fer men, treat you wife like a goddess in public, like your best friend in private, like a ho in the bedroom and wear the glasses that makes her look like the most beautiful gal in the world all the time (you know those your-thighs-are-not-fat deception glasses).

PS congrats -- was marriage all that you expected it to be?

I can't wait to see if somebody can come up with the answer to this :)
BTW congratulations on your anniversary!!

Happy Anniversary AndrosAnn. :)

PS congrats -- was marriage all that you expected it to be?

Thanks Lurker

Yes, I think it was, I was brought up at a time and in a culture where all girls were expected to get married and to do it when they were quite young. Came very close to it in my late teens and backed out about 6 months before the date. Mainly because I felt there were a lot of other things I wanted to do with my life.

By the time I met my DH, ten years later, I had done a lot of those things and so after 5 years of being together, we decided to take the major step and totally and legally commit. As I said to him at the time, I wasn't getting married to go through no divorce (I am his second wife).

Like all couples we have our ups and downs, but, as we both said last year when asked by a pair of newlyweds what the secret was. We sum it up in two little words "Yes, Dear!"

Similar values and backgrounds helps a lot. Marry your kind, same education, goals, et. laugh a lot, a sense of humour is very impotent, lol. And this is very important, similar sex drives (s), or you might get horn, and then you will not be happy.

O.K., today is our 17th Wedding Anniversary! Which has got me to thinking with all of the divorces that go on and all of the folks that choose not to get married, What do BI members think makes for a happy and long marriage?

Care to share your ides?

happy anniversary.

The only "ides" that I have, is the Ides of March.

As for longevity in marriage, I think women have to see through the jerk in every man, and love him like they did during the full adrenalin rush of infatuation.

And fer men, treat you wife like a goddess in public, like your best friend in private, like a ho in the bedroom and wear the glasses that makes her look like the most beautiful gal in the world all the time (you know those your-thighs-are-not-fat deception glasses).

very interesting stuff bro!!!!!!!!!

Happy Anniversary AndrosAnn

communication and compromise before and after marriage, without them any relationship is doomed.

Always find away to let your spouse/partner know they are the most important person to you, even if its something small like picking a flower and give it to them. When you pass something like the salt make sure you touch their hand and hold till they look and see you smile. Its the little things that seem like nothing thats worth more than a dozen roses because they are intimate.
Always remember you can't take or own someones love it has to be freely given to you every moment.

Similar values and backgrounds helps a lot. Marry your kind, same education, goals, et. laugh a lot, a sense of humour is very impotent, lol. And this is very important, similar sex drives (s), or you might get horn, and then you will not be happy.


I certainly agree with similar values being important, but not sure about backgrounds. My DH and I have been married 41 years this September and come from totally opposite backgrounds. I came from a sort of upper middle class white English background. My DH from a poor black family background in a Caribbean country. However, the moral values in both families were very similar, though the religious values were at opposite ends of the spectrum!

I loved him at first sight! He was studying law and working at the same time and I was just out of school and working in the Public Service. We had a very stormy courtship and the early years of marriage had some bad times, but we hung in there and I have absolutely no regrets.

Every experience in life gives us strength of character and I am so grateful for having had the opportunity to live in the Caribbean and the Bahamas. I am also grateful for having the love and support of such a wonderful, highly ethical man! I have to say that the relationship now is pretty much perfect as we have learned to accept our opposite personalities....but,again, having similar values has really helped to keep us together.

Congrats, Androsann!

The only "ides" that I have, is the Ides of March.

As for longevity in marriage, I think women have to see through the jerk in every man, and love him like they did during the full adrenalin rush of infatuation.

And fer men, treat you wife like a goddess in public, like your best friend in private, like a ho in the bedroom and wear the glasses that makes her look like the most beautiful gal in the world all the time (you know those your-thighs-are-not-fat deception glasses).



I approve this message!

Happy Anniversary Androsann!
Almost immediately after our wedding I felt compelled to focus on the reality of the mammoth responsibility before me (what was I thinking? LOL). It is a realm no amount of counselling could prepare me to face. This is where trial and error became my guide and thankfully we have celebrated 13 anniversaries to date.
Claiming to possess no authority on the subject at hand I simply submit actions I endeavour to follow that I feel have helped my wife to keep me around thus far.
1.Never yell at each other unless the house is on fire.
2.Honest and habitual communication is a must.
3.Trust and loyalty are inseparable.
4.Shared goals and aspirations.
5.Compliments go a long way.
6.Doing something special and unexpected. (a week away in a nice hotel)
I am still trying to appreciate the fact that men and women look at sex differently!

Areas of agreement that partners will have dealt with will generally include:
•Friendship.
•Role expectations.
•Emotional intimacy.
•Sexual expectations.
•Vision/Goals..
While these areas of agreement do tend to be present in healthy marriages, we should note that no marriage is perfect, and that many perfectly good marriages harbour disagreements with regard to some of the domains we've discussed. In general, however, the more domains you and your partner are in agreement on, the better are your chances for a healthy marriage. (Healthy marriage partners are compatible partners-Mental help Network)
Not long after the honeymoon is over, many couples suddenly feel that they must now be serious, no nonsense people. They tend to fall into a rut of unrealistic expectations, assuming their spouses can read their minds as to what they want and need. But real life is not a romantic fairy tale and only you can create an environment that is conducive to romance, and bring out the lover in your spouse. (Recipe for a Happy Marriage– Usha Rana)

The only "ides" that I have, is the Ides of March.

As for longevity in marriage, I think women have to see through the jerk in every man, and love him like they did during the full adrenalin rush of infatuation.

And fer men, treat you wife like a goddess in public, like your best friend in private, like a ho in the bedroom and wear the glasses that makes her look like the most beautiful gal in the world all the time (you know those your-thighs-are-not-fat deception glasses).

Happy Anniversary Androsann! Every year of marriage is an important milestone and should be celebrated.

Lurker, you are wise beyond your years. Very good advice.

Thanks Guys :)